(Not) Inspector Spacetime Web Series Trailer

Apparently, “Inspector Spacetime” is a funny spoof of DOCTOR WHO occasionally glimpsed on TV on the NBC series COMMUNITY, which is not on my watch list. It has proved so popular that it is spinning off a web series called (for legal reasons) Untitled Web Series About a Space Traveler Who Can Also Travel Through Time. The series will run six episodes and features Travis Richey in the starring role. The first teaser trailer for the series has been released, and it is… disappointing, to say the least.

See? It goes for the easiest jokes (that “cunning” bit… SRSLY?) and coveys nothing, really, about the series. I’m going to have to seek out some clips of the real series-within-a-series “Inspector Spacetime” to see what all the fuss is about, because I don’t see anything worth watching in the teaser.

The Man With the Iron Fists

How would you like to see Russell Crowe, Lucy Liu, Jamie Chung and RZA in a blood-soaked, no-holds-barred martial-arts movie that “puts the F-U in kung fu”?

The Wu-Tang Clan’s RZA has written and directed a movie called The Man With the Iron Fists that looks like one of those old exploitation flicks Quentin Tarantino loves so much. (In fact, QT has attached his name to it, in order to give the film some gravitas.) It looks uncompromisingly brutal when it comes to violence and bloodshed of all types, so of course it deserves a red-band trailer. That’s the kind of trailer that can only be shown before R-rated movies in movie theaters, and is tagged NSFW online. Trust me, this one lives up to its billing. Did I mention that was co-written by Eli Roth (Hostel)?
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Will Looper Tie Us Up in Knots?

The international trailer for this fall’s time-travel thriller Looper makes the movie look a little more complicated than it seemed before by adding a trite element seen in most “assassin” movies: Old Joe is supposed to kill his boss, the capo di tutti capi. Sigh.

I expected a little more from director Rian Johnson and collaborator Joseph Gordon-Levitt. But then again, perhaps they will come up with a unique twist on the clichéd plotline and it was used specifically for that goal. “A double-cross like you’ve never seen before!”

I still like the premise of trying to kill your future self — especially as the younger Joe specifies that what happens/happened to the older version of himself (played by Bruce Willis) doesn’t necessarily have to happen to him. Meaning that his own future isn’t set, and Old Joe’s past can be altered. That’s a very fluid situation!

(Sorry about the ad, but MSN is being very proprietary)

One thing we cannot change: Looper will not be released until Sept. 28.

Madea Is… Alex Cross?

On the one hand, I have to tip my cap to the producers of Alex Cross for having the guts to cast against type — but there are limits. Case in point: Tyler Perry as homicide detective/psychologist Alex Cross.

Now, I know Morgan Freeman — who played Cross in Kiss the Girls and Along Came a Spider — was considered too old compared to the character in James Patterson’s books, but I haven’t read them, so I don’t know if Perry is closer to the character on the page, but he doesn’t work for me onscreen. He’s just too doughy-looking to be a screen cop, and I keep expecting him to bust into a funny voice or come around a corner in drag. It’s kind of a wonder that Martin Lawrence wasn’t cast as the bad guy!


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Jena Malone May Land Catching Fire Role

Entertainment Weekly broke some great news about that Hunger Games sequel, The Hunger Games: Catching Fire, specifically that Jena Malone (HATFIELDS & MCCOYS, Sucker Punch) is being considered for the key role of Johanna Mason, the wily victor of a previous Hunger Games.

Johanna’s weapon of choice is the axe, since she hails from District 7, which specializes in lumber. She won her game by pretending to be a helpless weakling — until she moved in for the kill! In the novel, the character is described as possessing “a wicked ability to murder.”

Jena would be perfect for this role, because she can play very vulnerable, and, with her thin frame and young face, she can look meek, too. But Jena is also wiry, and she kicked trainloads of ass as Rocket in Sucker Punch! No one would doubt that Jena’s Johanna is a threat! Jena definitely has the acting chops to play a terrific foil for Jennifer Lawrence’s Katniss Everdeen.
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DOCTOR WHO’s Debut Moves Closer

It’s official: The first story in DOCTOR WHO’s seventh season will be called “Asylum of the Daleks,” and it will debut on Tuesday, Aug. 14, at The British Film Institute. The debut episode will also screen Aug. 25 at the 2012 Edinburgh International Television Festival.

The episode has been teased as containing “every Dalek ever,” from the original models seen in “The Mutants” to the Special Weapons Dalek of “Remembrance of the Daleks” to the New Paradigm from “Victory of the Daleks.” Personally, I think “Asylum of the Daleks” is a cray-cray name for the episode — unless it’s meant in the sense of political asylum. I cannot picture the petulant pepperpots getting their blobby green heads shrunk at a sanitarium — can you?

Executive producer Caroline Skinner told the BBC’s official DOCTOR WHO website: “This is an epic Dalek adventure that kicks off the new series in explosive style! If you think you know all there is to know about the Daleks, think again!”

I think I can’t wait!

TRUE BLOOD’s Tru Problem

Please! Oh, please — by the Vampire Bible, let Tara roast herself to (true) death! Please don’t let Pam rescue her at the beginning of next week’s TRUE BLOOD. The town of Bon Temps — and the show — would be so much better without Tara stomping through scenes, trying to suck up all the attention like an obstreperous child.

I absolutely despise the way the show has been emphasizing the most venomous, hate-spewing, unlikeable, nasty, contentious, repulsive and just plain mean character on TV. From the moment she appeared back in the first season, Tara has been begging to be staked — even if she only became a vamp this season. She may be a true bloodsucker now, but she’s always been a psychic and emotional vampire, draining her friends and family (and, I suspect, people she passes in the street), no matter how much they try to help her. Why is Sookie still friends with this walking train-wreck? (Even her name — Thornton, implies what a pain she is!)
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